Are you suffering from job burnout? Avoid doing this one thing.
What happens when you spend several decades on education and a career, only to find yourself burnt out, uninspired and depleted? There are steps you can take to recover, and one thing you need to avoid doing. More than ten years ago I was working as a litigation defense attorney and had reached the level of burnout. That one thing I did that I now warn others not to do is to ignore that feeling of burnout. Burnout doesn’t simply go away (as I discovered). Instead, it turns into chronic burnout with more severe problems.
Whether it was the constant stress I was subjected to in my career, or the fact that I had accomplished what I set out to do and no longer felt inspired, I was fried. My work felt mundane and I was unhealthy. How can such important work as lawyering feel mundane? Well, when you are chronically burnout out you simply are not inspired by anything any longer. Looking back, it had been a slow progression over many years. I didn’t particularly love most things about the law when I started out, but I really enjoyed defense litigation. Over time I was able to not only become good at it, but found tasks that I really looked forward to, such as jury work. Telling a story to a jury and following the structure of a trial was immensely different than the constant arguing in depositions and daily conferences that I had come to dislike. I also greatly enjoyed growing my law firm and running the business. But the things I liked about what I did started to get overshadowed by all the things I disliked, and that dislike was turning me into an angry and unhappy person. I found it difficult to create boundaries and leave work at the office no matter how good I was at multi-tasking. With three young children at home, there was never enough time for them, and my life was definitely off balance from where I wanted it to be.
I recall one poignant moment when I was talking to my client, who was a young physician, about our dreams to reinvent and what we would be if we could be anything else. I dreamed of opening a bed and breakfast — -using my passion for DIY and cooking to create an amazing and collaborative environment. She longed to open an art studio and hold events for children. Shortly after that conversation she passed away from cancer. I think about that conversation and her often, a reminder of how short life is and how I felt at that time that I wasn’t living my true purpose.
Burnout can cause much more than a feeling of not living your true purpose, it can cause you to be anxious, stressed, exhausted, and unbalanced. Left untreated, that burnout can become chronic which can result in depression, health problems and addictions. Either way, your performance decreases with your inability to concentrate, and you become detached in all areas of your life. Your relationships suffer as you struggle to merely exist. I remember going home at night and trying hard to be present for my family but the next morning, after a sleepless night of dreading work, I found myself unable to recall details of the night before. I was anxious, depressed and unhealthy. I had daily headaches, chest pain and uncomfortable symptoms related to reflux and ulcers. Some people suffer heart attacks, for me, it was a thyroid hemorrhage. I was on anti-anxiety medication and anti-depressants, in addition to the medications for reflux and ulcers. Even then I didn’t recognize that my problems were due to burnout because nobody talked about it. I had never heard the terminology until I sought help. I simply didn’t know what to do and wanted someone to tell me, so I went to a therapist. Imagine my surprise to learn that not only could my therapist not tell me what to do, but that she thought I was suffering from burnout.
I know, you’re probably reading this thinking that there’s lots of things that can cause a person to be unhealthy, anxious, stressed and depressed. It could have been job stress, having three kids or my busy lifestyle. You’re right. In fact, I denied I had burnout at first. When I first heard that diagnosis I decided I would fix myself by taking more time away from the office to spend with my family and for self care. That failed and I now know that awareness and honesty is an important first step. Burnout treatment with self care is an important second step. The third step? Instituting a lifestyle framework — -because self care alone, or even just changing jobs, isn’t the solution, as I discovered.
Once I became aware of my problem, and got honest about it, I was able to change directions and create a new life for myself as an entrepreneur and business owner. But, as noted, simply leaving my field of litigation defense was not like swallowing a magic pill that solved all my problems. In fact, new problems awaited me. The thing that made the real difference for me was a lifestyle framework plan, and working with a coach to implement it. Also, finding a community of like-minded people to share with made a big impact in my life, when previously I had most of my important conversations in my own head.
Burnout sufferers often suffer alone and when they get desperate enough they believe that leaving their job will be the answer to their problems. But it’s often not that simple because your career is only a portion of your life. A solid plan with an evaluation of your entire life and how to get balanced, as well as people to share with, will help you recover from burnout and successfully reinvent. A lifestyle framework is one that evaluates the things important to us as humans — -self care, health, fitness, career, finances, hobbies, relationships and mindfulness. When these things are all balanced, we are happy and inspired.
Today I am healthy, happy, unstressed and positive. My thyroid recovered, my ulcers healed, my pains went away and I take no medications. My relationships were restored and my inspiration returned. I have the freedom to do the things I want to do in life when I want to do them. I get plenty of sleep and exercise. I love what I do, but if I find myself dreading something I know it’s time for a change. I now know that as we grow, so too does what we want to do and how we spend our time. Progressive reinvention with tweaks to that lifestyle framework is necessary for a fulfilling and inspired life.
If you’re suffering from career burnout, I encourage you to not ignore it. Here’s what you can do instead:
- Recognize your burnout;
- Start a self care practice immediately;
- Seek medical treatment from a doctor if necessary;
- Make time for exercise, mindfulness, personal development and healthy eating;
- Work with a licensed therapist if you are anxious and/or depressed;
- Work with a coach to develop a new plan for your life according to a lifestyle framework, with accountability for reaching your goals. Talk about how you feel and put yourself out there to get inspired in new ways.
- Give yourself some grace with the understanding this will take some time.
Your awareness of your burnout doesn’t mean you will have to change your career. A self care practice and more time off may be the thing you need to implement to resolve your problems, especially if you love what you do and the rest of your life is balanced. My life was off balance in several areas and I needed to do more than just change my job. By working with a coach you will be able to discover where you need to implement permanent positive changes that will solve your burnout and get you to living your best life doing what you love to do, but as a happy, inspired and balanced person in all areas important to you. Live Inspired.
